Like Peter

October was a devastating month. If you've read my previous blogs, you'll know why... The real kicker, the straw that broke this camel's back, was the announcement in church that a dear little, five-year old boy we'd all been praying for, died from complications of the Swine Flu. It was too much hurt. My heart felt torn in a million little pieces for all that was lost and I became very angry at God. I didn't get it. Not one bit. It didn't make any sense to me, especially when Kyree, the five year old, died.

Then someone must have prayed...

I came across something in a book that has helped a little bit. It's something I need to grasp and not let go of...The author was talking about the struggle between self- and Christ-centered living. He used the story of Peter in Matthew 16. Peter had just confessed that Jesus was the Messiah, the Son of the Living God, and Jesus blessed him for his confession. In the next moment, Jesus announced the suffering and death that awaited Him in Jerusalem. Peter took Jesus aside and rebuked Him, saying "God forbid it Lord! This shall never happen to you."...

Peter didn't get it either... Either he didn't think it would happen, didn't think it could happen to the Son of the Living God. or he was asking Jesus to make it somehow NOT happen. And Jesus rebuked Peter for it. Rather, Jesus identified and rebuked Satan as the source of the comment. Satan's aim is to promote self-interest and self-service rather than the things of God. If Jesus had succumbed to his own self-preservation, where would we be now?

I'm like Peter...I don't get why those deaths and accidents had to happen, but I know now that God has a plan bigger than what I can comprehend. I also realize that, like Peter, I have operated in a self-centered way of living, rather than a Christ-centered way of living. I don't want to be like Peter any more. I don't want to sell out to Satan because being a Christ-follower is too painful. I don't want to serve Satan by serving self. I no longer want to be deceived.